Tuesday, August 3, 2010

My dad

The initial shock, anguish has turned to gradual acceptance of the inevitable. Malignant cells are taking over my dad's body and we, humans can do nothing about it. At night, with my eyes closed, sometimes open, I see them multiplying. I see myself-the powerful one, exterminating them. I want to wipe them out. I can't accept this helpless state. Neither love nor knowledge is of any help to him. Yet there is this faith that nothing can defeat my dad. My daddy is the strongest. I have never seen him afraid or weak. Now when I hold his hand to help him I abhor time with such intensity. Those strong hands that held my hands to help me through life have become shaky and weak. Sometimes I look at him and wonder how can there be a day when he is not around...it is impossible. These days he talks a lot about the past..about his childhood, his youth, his struggles...his parents and lost friends. I hope for a miracle.

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